Eu realmente odeio admitir, mas estou totalmente discriminado por você. Eu estou tentando tanto não mostrá-lo no Twitter, mas a cada minuto pensando em você me mata. Eu simplesmente não entendo nada, mais. Seu silêncio não está tão mal antes. Eu sou tão patético que até mesmo o seu "boa sorte para a sessão de amanhã" text feito um pouco melhor. Mas isso é tudo que eu tenho. Se você me ama, então por que não estamos juntos, por que estou aqui pensando em maneiras de levá-lo de volta. O que aconteceu, querida? Por favor, me diga.

I thought everything was going well. Yknow when you thought things wouldn't work out, and they did for a while, until you let your guards down.

You taught me that there is a difference between being together and dating. But you were wrong. There isn't a stage where you try things out. You don't choose to fall in love, darling, you just fall. And if two person fall in love, they are together.

I hope it's not just me, but other people out there who just doesn't want to know about other people's problems. I'm not talking about documentaries or reality shows, I actually likes them.

I'm talking about problems your friends share with you. Particularly your spouse, bf/gf. It's like they expect you to care. Which in fact, you don't, or can't.

For example, your gf's mom is being a bitch. And she complains to you on every bitchmove her mom makes. Is it supposed to be a request to talk to her mom? Am I supposed to be angry? 

See, most of you likes to rant. Me too, but I don't, and you do. Why? Because you don't understand how frustrating it is to listen. Maybe because no one tells you their problems, or maybe it's just you ranting all the time and not listening. Most of the time the listener get frustrated because they can't do anything to fix your problems, or maybe its not that big of a deal to even do anything.

 'My mom ignores me all the time. It's so annoying!' How the fuck am I supposed to help?

And its accumulative. Day 1, you complain about your parents. Day 2 you complain about work. Day 3 about colleagues. Day 4, boss. By day 10 I am already annoyed. Once you say anything, I already know where its going. Its going to the 'little things that doesn't involve me but makes us quarrel' box. And you make it sounds like the whole world is against you. Sometimes I start to wonder if you're the bad person and  I'm the only one who was smited.

I am a very selfish person. If I don't even have enough energy to run away from my problems, I don't want to hear yours. I get angry because I care (maybe you won't believe by now). I get angry because I feel bad about what you're going through and I can't help it. I don't really know why I get irritated.

Now you're telling me your friend's problem? Don't tell me you're just looking for an listening ear. Because when I say its not our problem (I actually meant 'my problem' but doesn't want to sound like an asshole), you got mad. Are you implying I should give all my money to your friend for her grandfather's surgery?

What I'm trying to say is, its okay to rant. But don't get sad or mad if the listener tells you its not their problem. They are not obliged to help you unless you ask for help anyway.

How will you feel if I say these to you?

My mom doesn't have enough money to pay for my school fees and she going around borrowing from relatives.

My boss is kind to me but sometimes when she's mad at something, she always expect me to fix it for her. It's like I'm just her tool.

My parents are getting old yet they are still working. I don't even think they have any saving left. And my brother is getting worried so he's being a dick about it.

Just so you know, you always ruin days with these. I pretend nothing happen and text you next morning. One day I may go ALL CAPS RAGE about it. And you wonder why I don't text you often.

Hey guess what? Suddenly, out of nowhere, I am interested in filming. Okay maybe its not out of the blue. Abstract videos, music videos have all be so influential. All those cool videos you watched just makes you want to make your own cool videos right? I wonder how cool videos will be without background music. See those will almost be like documentary. And I don't like documentaries that much because they are boring. 

I've been admiring things that are made of wood for a long while now. I thought it was called woodcraft, but I just googled and realised, woodcraft actually means using tools that are made of wood and some camping stuff. Which is kinda cool, but I'm more interested in how wood things/tools are made. Which are called woodworking.

I like it because the fact that wood have these ripple-like rings called grains. They are all so unique and natural. I sure some people like the smell of wood. I think I do. Perhaps it has something to do with my dad. He has been working with wood for a while and I need to learn things from him. When I get some money, I would want to rent a workshop area just for me and my dad to do some woodworking. Dad, please wait until that day comes. Its not going to be long now.

For today, I'm going to share this video that I stumble upon last night. It shows how an axe is made. It might be boring to some because we don't usually use these tools in Singapore. We use technologies more. I'm pretty ashamed of it actually. But because of this video, the metal axehead blade, I'm growing interest in metalworking too.

Courtesy is a very annoying thing. Its alright if its guys to girls, and the girls accept it treating the guy as a gentlemen. But its annoying when 2 very courteous people give ways to each other.

I wait for you, you wait for me; I'll have whatever you want to eat, no you'll decide, I'm okay with anything. Fuck! Stop it already. Next time I'll decide what to eat, I'll go when I want to and I'll just continue walking and not let a random stranger cross first. Because fuck the world.

Oh there's one time when my asked for 2 nuggets, and I gave her 2. Just 2. I could have given more because 2 was just ridiculous. But no, just 2. Why? Because I respect that. She wanted 2 because she wants to leave us more, or something like that right. So I just gave her and no question asked. I mean like, if she wants more, she could just take, its not like I'm selling right now am I?

My 'courteous' brother have to interfere. Instead of offering nicely, he said to me: "Seriously? You really gave just 2? Very filial." And to mom: "2 enough to eat ah?" Sarcastically

First of all, my mom's not retarded. She doesn't need my permission to have nuggets. So if she wants more, she can take it herself. Secondly, I don't have to make sure she get enough things to eat, nutrients. You continue to be a saint, I"m not suited.

And lastly, if you haven't already notice I'm getting pretty annoyed by the way he responds to questions and situations. If sarcasm is his language, he can go fuck himself. Only elder brothers think sarcasm is cool. Keep your temper in check. Its ridiculous, most of the time.

I mean like most elder brothers mostly like that. Sometimes snobbish and like to control. Like when I leave finished canned drinks on my table, don't tell me to throw it away the moment you came home alright?

I'm starting this awesome section where I recommend videos for you people to watch! I don't even know if anyone is reading this blog beside my girlfriend. HAHA. But oh well. 10 years down the road I can look back to these embarrassing posts I made when I was a teenager right? It's going to be fun. I can't believe I'm looking forward to grow old.

Gahhh! Win competition, unlimited facebook pictures update, cash prize and featured on newspaper! I'm too jealous. Too too jealous.

Noted to self: Need to win competition soon. Sigh.

I was asked by a man to give up my seat to an old lady like 10 mins ago. Yes I am an asshole who hog reserved seats like a boss. But he did the right thing. I didn't pretend not to see that old lady. Not that I would surely gave up my seat if I did either, to be honest. But he did the right thing.

I wonder what he's thinking? "this punk is being ignorant" I don't know. There could be hundreds of possibilities. I hope my facial expression wasn't showing any displeasure. And good day to you kind and polite guy.

I believe in god. Not the way people usually does. And I apologize if I ever offend anyone with what I'm going to say. Let's clear that up.

I believe in a single absolute entity, which may be called 'god'. But not as a person, nor animals or some other representatives. I think they're all misconceptions created by some 'storyteller' from ancient times. I see god as a spectator. I don't think anything that happens in life got to do with it, it shouldn't take credits or get blames. And you definitely don't depend on it.

Especially JC (no offense). People are buying this book too much. I didn't read it or give it a chance and I'm ashamed to diss it without accepting it first. But would you take a leap of faith down the cliff and let Jesus decide whether you live or die? I'm really sorry if this isn't the value taught in church. I might be misguided. The main point is:

I have a friend who believe in Jesus. She had a bad boyfriend. She blames god for it. Why can't you just end it? You have control of your own life. Well, she did. And of course, thanked god. But a week later, they got back together. And blamed god again. "god really hates me, why put break us up for a week and put us back again."

It sounds really ridiculous, right? Because you are the one who broke up with him, not god. You are the one who forgave him, not god. You are the one who gave him a chance to hurt you again, still not god.

God is just a motivation. You have to trust yourself and work for it. 'He' is not your excuse for living a lousy life. Don't say "god planned my life this way because the good parts will come later." You're lying to yourself. No good parts will come to you if you just lay around whining about it. Grow up.

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